Ultimatum - The Office (Season 7, Episode 13)

Michael anticipates the news regarding the status of Holly Flax and A. J.'s relationship, after Holly's year-end ultimatum that A. J. propose to her. To prepare for either outcome, Michael fills a "happy box" with celebration treats and a "sad box" with consolation items, as well as two videos of himself to be used to calm himself down should he get too excited or too depressed.

Pam, inspired by the cheerful office administrator from Vance Refrigeration, puts up a New Year's Resolution board in the office so everyone can post their resolutions. These include Michael resolving to floss, Kevin resolving to eat more vegetables, Ryan resolving to "live life like it's an art project," and Creed resolving to do a cartwheel.

When Dwight reveals his resolution is to "meet a loose woman", he goes out on the town along with fellow single men Darryl and Andy, in the hopes of meeting some women. Darryl suggests they try a bookstore, actually wanting to fulfill his own resolution to "read more" by purchasing an e-book reader. They later end up at a roller skating rink which is almost completely empty. Dwight skates off to a nearby strip club, Darryl uses his e-book reader and later lies that he was playing video games, and Andy skates around by himself to the music of Dave Matthews Band. They end by dancing together underneath the rink's strobe lights.

When Michael sees no ring on Holly's finger, he is at first ecstatic, and launches into celebration in his office. When he approaches Holly to talk, however, Holly receives a phone call from A. J., during which she tells him she loves him. Michael finds out later, through Phyllis and Erin, that Holly gave up on the ultimatum. Upset, Michael interrupts Pam's resolution-board meeting to chastise his employees for giving up on their resolutions, taking out his frustration on Kevin by force-feeding him broccoli as well as berating Creed for not even attempting a cartwheel. Holly sees the parallel Michael is making between these abandoned resolutions and her own abandoned ultimatum, and leaves the room abruptly, visibly upset.

Michael attempts to apologize to Holly, but she declines to talk. He has her join Kevin and Creed in his office so he can apologize to the two of them, simultaneously apologizing to Holly indirectly. Holly is later caught by the cameras telling A. J. that she wants to take a break from their relationship at least until she returns to Nashua.

As the new year's resolutions get out of hand, Meredith Palmer (Kate Flannery) reverts to smoking when she sees Pam's can of soda (her resolution being "drink less caffeine"), and Erin unintentionally angers Creed by doing a cartwheel in the middle of the office, profanely yelling at her. Pam tosses the resolution board into a dumpster, saying she has learned her lesson.

The episode closes with Michael helping Creed learn how to do a cartwheel. After performing an extremely weak one, an elated Creed declares his resolution complete.

Best Funny Quotes From The Office - Ultimatum

Man
Next up, secretary Schrute will read the minutes from Sunday’s meeting.
Minutes from previous meeting of Knights of the Night. No, Jim, hey!
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Jim Halpert
Oh.
This meeting is for Knights of the Night only.
Photo of Dwight Schrute

Photo of Dwight Schrute
Knights of the Night are volunteer crime patrollers. We’re often compared to the Guardian Angels, but we could not be more different from them. Seriously, we are nothing like the Guardian Angels. I mean, broad strokes purposes, sure. Think Guardian Angels. One of our many recent good deeds? We set out to capture the Scranton Strangler. Mission accomplished. Not by us.

I’m actually just looking for my Blackberry, so, carry on.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Dwight Schrute
No, no, no, no, no. I see how this movie ends. You make fun of me, everyone laughs, ha, ha, ha… screw you!
Dwight, don’t be bothered by your friend’s presence.
Man
Photo of Dwight Schrute
What are you going to do now? Are you going to make fun of our leader’s weird voice? Huh? mimicking the leader’s voice Dwight, don’t be bothered by the mumbles. Over the line, Jim.
I’m just looking for my phone, so… pretend I’m not here.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Fine. Minutes from previous meeting of Knights of the Night. That’s our official name, Jim.
Sounds good.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Reflective strips were glued to patrol jackets. Knights went outside with flashlights to test them.
Smart.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Dwight Schrute
And the rest was just mumblesstuff.
Go ahead and read it, some people weren’t here.
Man
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Okay. Knights stayed outside to play flashlight tag.
Oh, come on, that sounds awesome.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Member
It was pretty cool.
Was it?
Photo of Jim Halpert
Member
It was fun.
It was pretty awesome.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Jim Halpert
answers phone Hey! Yeah. No, I got it. Just leaving now.

January three, 2011. A day which will live in-famously. Holly Partridge Flax, otherwise known as Holly, otherwise otherwise known as a living, breathing angel, is engaged to another man. This is freaking me out. I- okay, let’s switch to the happy video, okay? No, no, no, no, let’s push through. We’ll do this.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Michael Scott
Today will either be the best or the worst day of my life. Holly gave AJ an ultimatum. He either proposes by New Year’s or they break up. Now, if she’s engaged, I’m gonna go crazy, and I’m gonna start attacking people. If she’s not engaged, in all honesty, I may just burn this whole place to the ground out of happiness. Either way, I am going to need some talking down. And nobody talks me down like myself in a video talking me down.

filming video Michael, I know what you’re thinking. Holly’s engaged to another man, and you want to kill yourself. It may seem like a good idea, but it’s not.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
giggles Snot. Sorry, it sounded like you said it’s snot. I am so sorry.
Okay, so killing yourself. laughs I was just thinking about snot.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Angela Martin
Good morning.
Hey, guys! Fun thing. The index cards on your desk are resolution cards. You write your New Year’s resolution on them, I’ll collect them, and then display them on… da-da-da-da-da! This! Resolution board.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Wow. Did your baby draw that?
The glitter is blinding.
Photo of Angela Martin
Photo of Phyllis
I think it’s good.
It’s gonna be fun.
Photo of Pam Beesley

Photo of Pam Beesley
I recently met Sue, the office administrator at Vance Refrigeration. She has this awesome wall full of fun initiatives and morale boosters and stuff. Sue just goes for it, she’s awesome.

I know Sue. She’s not that great. And you know her husband’s in a wheelchair, right?
Photo of Phyllis

Photo of Erin
Okay, champagne.
Happy.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
Sponge.
Sad. To soak up my tears.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
Gummi bears and gummi worms.
Bears sad, worms happy. Come on, Erin.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
Ukulele’s happy?
Sad, something to break.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
Chocolates.
For you, job well done.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
Thank you! And two bottles of scotch.
Both sad.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
And did you get the tickets?
I did! I did, indeed. Two front row center, to Paula Poundstone, Live in Poughkeepsie. Holly’s favorite. I hope she doesn’t call us up on stage. That would suck. “Hey, you think you can do my job better?” I don’t know. “What’s your name?” Michael.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Erin
I’m really excited for Michael either way. Because if Holly chooses to be with him, he will be so, so happy. And if not, he’ll be avoiding the biggest mistake of his life!

Oh, hey, guys! I’d like to introduce you to a new little friend of mine. His name is New Year’s resolution board.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Shaaa-shut up. Hello.
What happened? Is there a ring?
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Photo of Michael Scott
So… high five me. We’re back. To a happy… grabs Holly’s hand look at those! Mittens. Are those a present?
whispering Come on!
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Photo of Holly Flax
They’re warm.
They’re so fuzzy and warm! Let me feel those. Let me feel that. Put ‘er there. Give me a good firm… ooh! That’s a good firm handshake. You’re hired! Yes, let’s get right into the Anderson account, shall we? Yes, yes, right away.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Hey, hey, hey. Want me to crank the thermostat up to 90, smoke her out? She can’t keep those mittens on forever.
Yes, no, why? Stop! Yes.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Kevin Malone
Holly takes off mittens revealing no ring on her ring finger Congratu-ohhh.
Wow.
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Photo of Michael Scott
Oh my God! That’s it! That’s it!
Oh, I get it. Everybody knows about the ultimatum.
Photo of Holly Flax
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Yes, I told everyone.
sticking both ring fingers up Ha ha, ha ha!
Photo of Holly Flax
Photo of Kevin Malone
Hey! sticking up middle finger Right back atcha, bitch!

Happy! Happy, happy, happy, happy!
Photo of Michael Scott
Video Michael
Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay, calm down, breathe.
I’m trying!
Photo of Michael Scott
Video Michael
I said breathe!
I’m trying!
Photo of Michael Scott
Video Michael
Wait a second, are you listening to music?
What?
Photo of Michael Scott
Video Michael
Shut that off!
I’m not listening to music!
Photo of Michael Scott
Video Michael
Fine, just go crazy for a little while! Lookin’ good! You’re lookin’ good. roping Michael in Oh, I gotcha! I gotcha! I’m pulling you back! Michael dance off!
Go! Oh, that’s nice.
Photo of Michael Scott
Video Michael
Go!
Me? Okay.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
Go!
Nice! We’re gonna calm down later.
Video Michael
Photo of Michael Scott
I’m good.
Oh, yeah!
Photo of Erin
Photo of Michael Scott
Oh my God! sprays champagne on Erin

Hey, Dwight, I’m collecting resolution cards.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Not doing that.
Why not?
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Dwight Schrute
I’ve achieved plenty and there’s no better than the best.
Drink less caffeine. That’s a good one, Pam. Here’s mine.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Pam Beesley
Learn to cook for one!
Yeah. I love cooking, but I always find myself throwing out half the food that I prepare, so… two years is time to just start preparing the right amount of food for the right number of people, which is one.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Pam Beesley
Well, maybe you’ll meet someone.
No, some people don’t just meet someone. I’m fine with it. Really. This is not a pity party. It’s not a party at all. It’s just sad.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Pam Beesley
Angela.
Yes.
Photo of Angela Martin
Photo of Pam Beesley
Make time for romance!
Who’s the senator?
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Photo of Angela Martin
My boyfriend.
Oh, you mean the state senator. I’m sorry, I was confused, because you accidentally wrote ‘the senator’.
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Photo of Angela Martin
Ugh.
Wait, it’s that easy? That’s not a resolution, that’s just… something I want to do. Okay, fine. I can do that… sticks note card on board, makes trumpet sound My resolution is… meet a loose woman.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Angela Martin
Oh, God.
That’s a good one.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Yeah.
You know what, that’s my new one. I’m taking that one, too.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Awesome.
You know what you guys should do? Go to the bookstore at lunch. There’s tons of cuties and it’s easy to talk to them. ‘Hey, what book is that? Cool, let’s hang out tonight. Sex already? Whoa…’
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Andy Bernard
The bookstore?
It’s that easy?
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
I’ll come with you, show you how it’s done.
Okay, I’ll drive.
Photo of Dwight Schrute

Photo of Darryl Phylbin
My resolution is to read more. And if someone else is driving me to the bookstore, I can eat my PB&J in the car. 2011 is coming up all Darryl.

Hello! Oh, somebody’s got a new phone!
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
Yeah.
That is neat.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
I got it for Christmas. I’m so out of my league here.
imitating E.T. E.T. phone Holly. Holly like phone?
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
imitating E.T. Holly misses old phone.
imitating E.T. Why?
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
imitating E.T. New phone is confusing. Gets bad reception.
imitating E.T. Bummer.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
imitating E.T. Bummer.
imitating E.T. Reese’s Pieces.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
imitating E.T. Reese’s Pieces?
Oh, God, please stop!
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Photo of Michael Scott
I still have my old phone. This thing… indestructible. slams phone on desk, phone breaks
reaches for her cell phone Oh, I should get this. Hey! Oh, no, don’t go see that one, I want to see that together. Yeah, go see that action one. Okay. I love you, too. All right.
Photo of Holly Flax

Photo of Michael Scott
Holly doesn’t seem to be engaged, but she’s talking to AJ like she is. I can’t figure it out. Do you think she’s already dating a different AJ?
I don’t think so.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
When you broke it off with Roy, did you still tell him you loved him?
No.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
But you did still love him.
I’m not… I’m not going to have…
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Do you love him now?
No! Just talk to her.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
No. She’d just resent me. Or worse! She would think of me as her friend. disgusted voice Oh, hi friend! Blegh.
I’ll talk to her, Michael.
Photo of Phyllis
Photo of Michael Scott
You think she’d talk to you?
Why wouldn’t she?
Photo of Phyllis
Photo of Michael Scott
That’s true. She’s really nice. She’d talk to anybody. Why don’t you bring Erin to balance you out?
There’s a plan.
Photo of Pam Beesley

Photo of Andy Bernard
All right! We should divide up by section. I will take romance and travel.
I’ll take the entirety of the second floor.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
I got that cutie behind the counter.

Well, if you read a lot, you should check out our e-readers. They’re really neat.
Bookstore employee
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Whoa, I work at a paper company, those things terrify me. They could put us out of business, you know? I heard those machines hold like, ten books at once.
Actually, it’s ten thousand.
Bookstore employee
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Holy bleep, what? Let me see that. It’s so light. Like a croissant.

Hi.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Customer
Hi.
Welcome.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Andy Bernard
Let us know if you need anything.
Thanks.
Customer
Photo of Andy Bernard
Why did we pretend like we work here?
Is that what we were doing?
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Hey, how’d you do?
Good!
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Good. Real good.
Really?
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Yeah, yeah!
We kinda nailed it.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Yeah, pretty much. But, you know, this place is kinda tapped out, so. Let’s roll.
Cool.
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Okay. What’d you get?
A book about oceans.
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Oh, really? What else? Let me see.
No, that’s uh. Porn. Pornography. Old lady… nasty… porn.
Photo of Darryl Phylbin

Photo of Phyllis
whispering Follow my lead. Hey, want some company?
Want some company?
Photo of Erin
Photo of Holly Flax
Oh, sure. Have a seat. How were your breaks?
Oh, really good, I went to Portugal.
Photo of Phyllis
Photo of Erin
I went to Portugal.
Oh, wow… you went together?
Photo of Holly Flax
Photo of Phyllis
No.
No.
Photo of Erin
Photo of Phyllis
So, I’ve just gotta know. What’s going on with you and AJ?
Nothing really happened. I mean, I know I made a big deal about this whole New Year’s deadline, but um, it came and went… and, we’re still together.
Photo of Holly Flax
Photo of Phyllis
You didn’t break up with AJ at all? I mean, not even for a week to make him buy you a present?
It just wasn’t fair of me to give him an ultimatum in the first place. The whole thing is totally my fault. But we’re going to be just fine. Just fine.
Photo of Holly Flax

Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Whoa! Hold on.
I am not going back until I fulfill my resolution.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Dwight heads toward a strip club Oh, no, no, no. Uh-uh.
Come on, why not? I’ve never been in one before. I’m tired of being Mr. Perfect Role Model all the time.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
I’m telling you, don’t do it. I’ve got nothing against strip clubs, but I do have something against them at noon on a Monday. The day shift at a strip club? You can’t unsee that.
Well, we can’t just go back, I mean, we came out to meet women.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Andy Bernard
Hey, there’s a roller rink across the street! There’s always chicks at the rink.
What kind of chicks are you going to meet there?
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Andy Bernard
I don’t know. Single moms at a skating party. Sweet sixteen, ten year reunion parties.
Chicks fall down, need help getting back up.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Andy Bernard
Roller derby practice!
We’re going skating.
Photo of Darryl Phylbin

Photo of Pam Beesley
The goal of this meeting is to get everybody excited about their resolutions! Who’s been good about their resolutions so far? Erin. Tell us about it.
Well, my goal was to learn a new word every single day. And I must say that it is going immensely.
Photo of Erin
Photo of Pam Beesley
Cool! Here’s a little ‘way to go’ gift from Sabre. tosses Erin a Frisbee
Intercepted!
Photo of Gabe
Photo of Erin
Hey! Gabe.
Whoops.
Photo of Gabe
Photo of Pam Beesley
Creed. I noticed you don’t have a resolution on the board. What’s yours?
I want to do a cartwheel. But real casual-like. Not make a big deal about it. But I know everybody saw it. Just one stunning, gorgeous cartwheel.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Pam Beesley
How is it going?
I’m having a little trouble motivating.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Pam Beesley
One of the hardest parts about making resolutions is keeping them. In fact, most resolutions are abandoned by February.
Or sooner.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Pam Beesley
Yeah.
That’s not a joke.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Pam Beesley
But that’s okay. Because it’s not about being perfect, it’s about trying. In fact, why don’t we go around and confess some of the ways that we’ve fudged on some of our resolutions?
Well, I said that I would eat more vegetables, and I haven’t yet. But it’s okay. I still have time, since last year, I ate none.
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Pam Beesley
Okay, well, my confession is that today I had a sip of coffee. But that’s fine.
Is it?
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Pam Beesley
Yes! Because with all of your support, by this time next year maybe I’ll be down to one glass of iced tea a week.
Next year? Come-I mean, what is the point? What is the point of that? I made a resolution to floss, and I did it. 12:01, January first, BAM! Blood everywhere.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Kevin Malone
Well not all of us are Michael Freaking Scott.
What is wrong with you people? Can’t you stick to anything? Erin, I want you to go to the kitchen and get me some vegetables. Creed, you say you want to do a cartwheel? Nothing’s stopping you. Come on, old man, do a cartwheel!
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Creed Bratton
Well, I can’t, I don’t know how.
You’re just gonna somersault around for the rest of your life and you know what’s going to be on your tombstone? Loser.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Creed Bratton
My tombstone’s already made, thank you.
Just do a cartwheel!
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Erin
This is all I could find.
holding broccoli in front of Kevin Eat it.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Pam Beesley
You don’t have to do that, Kevin.
I don’t know. I’m glad this is happening. Thank you, Michael.
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Why are you eating stem first?
This is a new food for me, how else should I eat it?
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Ryan
The other way.
Can I get some cheese whiz? Or hollandaise?
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Michael Scott
No. No cheese whiz, no hollandaise, no chocolate sauce, just eat it. Come on. Here comes the airplane, there you go. Open, open, into the hanger, there you go.
Oh, Michael.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Eat it. Put it in your mouth, and just eat it.
God, I hate it.
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Michael Scott
I don’t care whether you hate it! You said you’d do it!
All right!
Photo of Angela Martin
Photo of Michael Scott
Eat it!
You’re killing him, Michael!
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Photo of Michael Scott
All right, all right, shh!
All right, I ate the fluffy part, can I be done?
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Michael Scott
Let me see if you swallowed it, open your mouth. Under your tongue. reveals hidden broccoli, spits it out Oh, God! You guys are pathetic.
Can I get some candy, or something?
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Michael Scott
No! You can’t have any candy!
I’ll get him water.
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Photo of Pam Beesley
Okay, Michael, just settle down.

imitating E.T. Holly Flax.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
Yes, Michael?
imitating E.T. Not Michael, E.T.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
What’s up?
Well, I just want to talk about what happened in there.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Holly Flax
Oh, no, Michael, I don’t want to talk about it with you. I mean, I’m fine, I just… I don’t want to talk about it.

Holly, come on in. Thanks for coming. I thought there should be an HR rep here for this. So, Kevin and Creed, things got a little bit intense in the conference room.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Creed Bratton
You think?
And I wanted to apologize. These resolutions should be about you, and I made it about me, and it was none of my beeswax.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Kevin Malone
You were super mean.
It was insensitive and I am sorry.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Kevin Malone
It was traumatizing, Michael. I wouldn’t be surprised if I never ate a vegetable again.
I really wanted you to follow through on your resolutions. The cartwheel, the veggies… I… care about you. Very much. And you loom so large in my heart that I crossed the line.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Kevin Malone
Okay, Michael, no offense, but you need to get your own life.
You’re right. And I hope that we can still be friends.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Creed Bratton
I don’t think I’m there yet, Boss.
Well, I am. hugs Michael
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Michael Scott
Okay, oh! All right.
I’m going to help you.
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Michael Scott
Okay.

at the skating rinkHey, uh. It’s just you. Anything you want to hear?
DJ
Photo of Andy Bernard
Um… Dave Matthews Band. No hits! Deep tracks only.
Okay. Ants Go Marching starts playing
DJ
Photo of Andy Bernard
I said no hits!

I just feel blocked. Like I’m living, but I’m not…
Photo of Ryan
Photo of Kevin Malone
Hey, Ryan.
Yeah.
Photo of Ryan
Photo of Kevin Malone
How’s your fart project coming?
That’s real, real classy, Kevin. Hey, was it me or you that just shoved the butt end of a pound of broccoli into my mouth because Michael told me to?
Photo of Ryan
Photo of Kevin Malone
Me.
Kevin, don’t! Come on!
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Oh, Pam, soda. Caffeine!
Yeah, just a little, I have a lot to deal with today.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Meredith Palmer
holding a pack of cigarettes Well, if you don’t have to do ’em…
Meredith, what are you doing? I could be pregnant!
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Photo of Ryan
Okay, no.

My resolution was to get more attention.
Photo of Kelly Kapoor

Photo of Ryan
No, she’s lying.
Hey, Ryan. taps board, makes farting noise
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Erin
One, two, three. does cartwheel I did it! I did a cartwheel!
bleep you! bleep you! God!
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Pam Beesley
Okay, that’s it.

throws resolution board away in dumpster Lesson learned.
Photo of Pam Beesley

Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Sup?
Hey! Where did you go?
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
To the arcade.
Oh, cool.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Why, did you meet someone?
Yeah, I did actually. His name is Andy, and he roller skates like a Greek god and you know what? I kinda like hanging out with him.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Right on, son.
Gentlemen.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Andy Bernard
And where did you go?
Strip club. I was looking at the strippers at the strip club.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Right.
So, that’s it, guys? If you want, I can put on the strobe.
DJ
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Yeah!

You want to keep this?
Photo of Erin
Photo of Michael Scott
No.
Do you want to keep this?
Photo of Erin
Photo of Michael Scott
Yup.
Do you want to keep this?
Photo of Erin
Photo of Michael Scott
You can toss them.

My resolution? I never want to make Holly cry again. Unless it’s from laughing too hard. Or making love too beautifully.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Holly Flax
We’re gonna be just fine. You know how you say something over and over and the words start to sound weird? Going to be just fine… just fine… just fine… just fine…

I just think we need to cool things down for awhile. Yeah, a break. At least until I get back to Nashua. Yeah, I’m sure.
Photo of Holly Flax

Photo of Michael Scott
Look at where you’re going to be doing the cartwheel. So look at where you’re going to be placing your hands. So pick a spot.
Mmmhm.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Michael Scott
You ready to do this?
Yes, sir.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Michael Scott
You know what? I’m going to stay here as long as it takes.
I really appreciate it, Boss.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Michael Scott
It’s about you. It’s about you. Go!
I did it!
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Michael Scott
You did?
The perfect cartwheel.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Michael Scott
Okay.
What a rush! That’s all I had to do all year.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Michael Scott
Congratulations. All right. Well, all right. See you tomorrow.

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