Job Fair - The Office (Season 4, Episode 17)

Ryan has given Jim a warning about his job performance, so Jim tries to land his biggest client ever by taking the potential client golfing along with Andy and Kevin. Every time Jim tries to get the sale... the client comes up with a reason that he can't switch to Dunder Mifflin. But Jim persists and, after blocking the client from leaving the golf course for 15 minutes, finally lands the account.

Michael, Pam, Oscar and Darryl set up a booth at a local job fair - they're looking for a student for Dunder Mifflin’s summer internship program. While other companies booths are prepared and have materials and products, Michael instructed Pam to bring only a single white piece of Dunder-Mifflin paper.

The fair proves unsuccessful - Michael drives off the only student to stop by their booth because he's not cool enough. As the job fair is winding down, Michael grabs a microphone and makes a speech which causes a teacher to call security and have him removed from the fair.

As they are leaving, Pam goes into a booth for n advertising / graphic design company. She realizes she has a lot to learn and the man working the booth says she will have plenty of opportunities to learn about graphic design in Philadelphia or New York City.

Dwight, left in charge of the office while Michael (and Jim) is away tries desperately to keep everyone working... but alas everyone but Angela sneaks out mid-day.

Best Funny Quotes From The Office - Job Fair

Photo of Michael Scott
Hey. Ready? Come on, show me excited!
Yes. small fist-pumps from both Pam and Oscar.
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Photo of Michael Scott
Yeah, I’m pretty excited too.

Today I’m heading over to the job fair at Valley View High School, to find some new interns. Want to get some fresh blood. Um, euthanize this place.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Hey, are we doing this thing?
Yup.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Kelly Kapoor
Oh my God, Darryl, you look like Barack Obama. Everybody I’m dating Barack Obama!
Why are you dressed like that?
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
in a dress shirt and tie Like what?
Like you’re applying for a loan.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Maybe he’s going to church. Or court.
Figured I look presentable. looks Michael over You? Michael dressed casually in jeans and sneakers Went a different way.
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Pam Beesley
to Darryl I think you look nice.
simultaneously Thank you.
Michael and Darryl
Photo of Michael Scott
Okay, here’s what we’re going to do: I’m going to instruct the kids about management and sales. Oscar will be in charge of accounting. Pam will be eye candy. No… uh, also, because that is your alma mater. Darryl will hire some kids for the warehouse. We don’t have to worry about internships with them, because they definitely ain’t going to college.
What college did you go to Mike?
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Michael Scott
Let’s go!

Today, I am meeting a potential client on the golf course, because Ryan put me on probation. You remember Ryan, he was the temp here. Yeah. And uh, it is not a good time for me to lose my job. Since I have some pretty big long term plans in my personal life with Pam, that I’d like her parents to be psyched about. So I am about to do something very bold at this job that I’ve never done before. Try.
Photo of Jim Halpert

Phil Maguire
takes golf swing Whoa!
Mr. Maguire, it’s been a couple of years.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Phil Maguire
Hey Jim, how are you, nice to see you man.
Oh no! No, no-no-no-no! My grandfather would be spinning in his urn, if he knew that I was out here with a Dartmouth boy. You take that shirt off right now or I will take it off for you, sir. I am… totally and completely kidding! they both laugh Andrew Bernard, Cornell ’95.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Phil Maguire
Phil Maguire, Dartmouth, ’74 goes to shake Andy’s hand
Oop, got some blisties.
Photo of Andy Bernard
Phil Maguire
Yeah, you do.

Hit about 1200 balls last night, in preparation for today, so hands are a little tender. shows blisters on both hands It’s actually not funny at all. It’s incredibly painful.
Photo of Andy Bernard

Phil
Let’s make it interesting, say, uh, ten bucks a hole?
Great!
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Kevin Malone
What are we talking? Skins? Acey Duecy? Bingo bango bongo? Sandies, Barkies? Arnies, Wolf? What?

I’m gonna take this petty cash I got from Oscar, and turn it into next month’s rent.
Photo of Kevin Malone

Photo of Pam Beesley
So many memories in this old gym. Pretending I have PMS so I didn’t have to play volleyball, pretending I have PMS so I didn’t have to play basketball. Those were the days!

Darryl approaches as students throw basketballs A little over the top, don’t you think?
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Show them what you brought, Mike.
holds up single sheet of paper Um, that’s all we brought.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
This is all we need.
We’ll see.
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Photo of Michael Scott
Yes we will see Oscar, we will see, because a blank sheet of paper equals endless possibilities! Conceptual! All right! We. Are. Open for business! all four of them sit in an empty booth with small Dunder Mifflin sign Hello!

Andy, you’re up, let’s go!
Photo of Kevin Malone
Photo of Andy Bernard
gushing lotion inside his golf gloves Giddy up, let’s do this.

People assume I’m great at golf. But like everybody, I hated golf lessons when I was a kid. So, I used to hang out at the sailing club instead. Got my “knot” on.
Photo of Andy Bernard

Photo of Andy Bernard
swings Dammit!

Guys, do we have to stay all day?
Photo of Meredith Palmer
Photo of Phyllis
I mean, Michael’s gone, can’t we just go?
Yeah, and I finished my work months ago!
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Excuse me, people. It has come to my attention, some of you have forgotten, who is in charge here. When Michael is gone… Jim is in charge. When Jim is gone, Andy and I are in charge. When Andy is gone you answer to me. Okay? Stanley gets up to go Excuse me where do you think you’re going? Oh no, no, no. You’re not leaving. No! Stanley, do not walk out that door! If you walk out that door, so help me, I will – Stanley leaves He left. Last time I checked, the American workday ends at five pm. You will all stay at your desks until that time. Or, you will suffer the consequences.
What consequences?
Photo of Phyllis
Photo of Dwight Schrute
I will tell on you.

There’s some filing, restocking the supply shelves. Replacing the water jug, which nobody likes to do. Um, we… uh, eat a lot of cake!
Photo of Pam Beesley
Justin
Cool.
laughs Yeah, and uh, you basically learn how an office runs.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Hello. Hi. to Pam Can I talk to you for a sec? Excuse me.
This is Michael, my boss. she points Justin.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Hey, uh, remember what we talked about, in the car on the way up, “only the best and the brightest.”
He’s nice and he seems interested.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
He’s totally wrong, Pam. to Justin Hey.
Hi.
Justin
Photo of Michael Scott
How you doing? Listen, I don’t think that a handsome, funny, smart, funny-looking kid like you, should limit himself. You could do whatever you want to do. You could be a classy janitor, or a cashier with dignity, or a… migraine worker. takes back the info flyer Justin holds Maybe for you, paper should be more of a hobby.
Sorry for wasting your time.
Justin
Photo of Michael Scott
Oh, no problem. looks down And he signed! He put his name on the piece of – okay, that was supposed to be a blank canvas on which to put their hopes and dreams. And he just, made it into a stupid piece of paper. We need another one, immediately.
Yeah, the booth is lame without it.
Photo of Darryl Phylbin
Photo of Pam Beesley
I only brought the one.
Are you mental?
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Pam Beesley
Michael, do you remember, you specifically told me to only bring one sheet of paper? You said it only takes one sheet to make a difference. And I said, “Are you sure Michael?” And you said “Pam! Pam! Pam!” And then you sneezed in my tea, and then you said, “Don’t worry, it’s just allergies.” Do you remember that?
I… don’t.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Pam Beesley
Okay. I’ll go look for another one. she leaves
And that. Is why. I need a smart intern.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Jim Halpert
Hey, so how’s the direct mail business going?
I can’t complain, people love their junk mail.
Phil
Photo of Jim Halpert
Now are you getting all your paper from PPC? Or-
You know what Jim? I’m not really looking to change things up right now, I just came out here to get out of the office for a little bit, so why don’t we just play, okay?
Phil
Photo of Jim Halpert
Absolutely, will do.

So I guess I’ll just… work on my short game.
Photo of Jim Halpert

Photo of Michael Scott
teen approaches table Hello there.
What is this company?
Kid
Photo of Michael Scott
Well it’s funny that you should ask, because it’s really more than a company…
Dunder Mifflin paper.
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Kid
Thanks. walks away
Dammit, Oscar!
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Michael Scott
Yeah, I’m trying to lure these kids into my booth, but uh, kids are very wary about being “lured” these days. Thank you Dateline!

Thank you. hangs up phone, leaves for restroom
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Angela Martin
Extension 128.
over phone Hiya Pumpkin, it’s Creed.
Photo of Creed Bratton
Photo of Creed Bratton
Say, we’re gonna ditch this bitch. You in?
No.
Photo of Angela Martin
Photo of Creed Bratton
Are you out? Angela hangs up Pumpkin’s out, let’s go gang! they all make a run for the door, Dwight re-enters room with only Angela left

My old art room. finds a sheet of blank paper Oh, maybe it’s still here! looks for her painting No. No they must have taken it down. Never mind.
Photo of Pam Beesley

Photo of Michael Scott
answers cell What do you want?
Michael, I know you’re swamped. I just thought you should know that everyone in the office has left, except for Angela and I. Do not worry though, I have taken down their names, and I have docked them a personal day.
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Photo of Michael Scott
Who cares? I’m not there, Jim’s not there, why should they have to be there?
So… what else is up? Michael hangs up Mich-
Photo of Dwight Schrute

Photo of Michael Scott
Thank you! Pam hands him blank paper What, what is this?
A piece of paper.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
This isn’t Dunder Mifflin paper. Some sort of Pendleton crap.
Well I think they’ll get the spirit of it.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Pam-Pam-Pam-Pam-PamPamPamPam! We’re dying here. I want you to go back to the office and I want you to get the real stuff. I want you to get ultra white card stock.
Are you serious?
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Yes. And don’t call me Shirley.
Okay.
Photo of Pam Beesley

Phil
Oh! Phil is stuck in the sand trap Ah, dammit!
You know, you can just pick it up, take the triple bogey.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Phil
Yeah I’ll- I’ll get it out. Thank you.
Yep. Maguire keeps swinging
Photo of Jim Halpert

Angela and Dwight
silently working Pam walks back into office, gets paper out of the copier, shows it “voila” to camera, leaves

Jim’s cellphone rings AH! Come on, Tuna!
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Jim Halpert
Hey, can’t really talk now, what’s up?
Just checking in, how’s it going?
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Jim Halpert
Uh, you know, we’ll see, we’ll see.
I just drove twenty miles round-trip back to the office to get Michael a single sheet of white paper. So, I could have just had them fax it to me, I guess.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Jim Halpert
Oh, I like you.
Talk to you later?
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Jim Halpert
Yeah. All right. Bye. Kevin sinks putt All right. Sorry, I got to annoy you one more time. What if I bring down shipping costs?
You can try. But I’ve looked at your prices. Even with free shipping? Doesn’t work. It’s just- it’s not in the stars, Jim. Phil sinks putt Six.
Phil
Photo of Kevin Malone
Yeah.
All right, race to the next hole! he runs off to the cart
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Kevin Malone
Ooh! Winner gets ten bucks! Wait -wait for me! Andy!
Shortcut! Shortcut! drives cart off course, it flips over Woah! I fell in the sandtrap!
Photo of Andy Bernard

Photo of Dwight Schrute
hums at copier, Angela waiting behind him

All of these jobs? Suck. I would rather live jobless, on a beach somewhere, off the money from a large inheritance, than to have to work in any one of these crap-holes. They suck.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Michael Scott
Hey! walks up to Oscar and Darryl tossing basketballs, grabs Oscar’s ball Game over. kicks the ball up to the gymnasium ceiling

singsong Just-in time.
Photo of Michael Scott
Justin
Hi.
Just-in case. What’s your last name?
Photo of Michael Scott
Justin
Polznik.
This… just in. Justin Polznik! Huh?
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Michael Scott
Justin is the ugly girl in the movie, who takes off her glasses and she’s hot! And you realize she was always hot, she was just wearing glasses. And that you were the blind one. He’s the most… important thing in my life right now.

I want you to meet my family. Come on. Oscar Martinez. Accountant extraordinaire. This is Justin.
Photo of Michael Scott
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Hey.
Hi.
Justin
Photo of Michael Scott
This is Darryl Philbin. Isn’t he big? And you already met her, Pam Beesly, office hottie. She will “do” you. laughs No, no. But she has already dated two guys in the office, that we know of, so, this could be number three, you never know?
Excuse me.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Photo of Michael Scott
Come here. I would never say this to her face, but she is a wonderful person and a gifted artist.
Why, why wouldn’t you say that to her face?
Photo of Oscar Martinez
Photo of Michael Scott
So, what do you think? Think these guys are nice? The guys I didn’t bring are even better. Justin, I’m willing to commit right now. Would you do me the honor, of spending the summer with us, at Dunder Mifflin? I think, I think you are very special.
You didn’t want me before. That’s what you said.
Justin
Photo of Michael Scott
No, I didn’t. You misconstrued me.
You were kind of a jerk to me.
Justin
Photo of Michael Scott
I, uh, hmm.
And I’m, I’m gonna go now.
Justin
Photo of Michael Scott
Why don’t… hey.

trying to pick up a beer bottle with blistered hands, struggles trying to take a drink as everyone watches.
Photo of Andy Bernard

Photo of Dwight Schrute
tries to stop a sneeze Ah-choo!
Bless you.
Photo of Angela Martin
Photo of Dwight Schrute
Thank you. Angela turns to look at him.

Okay, Jim, you owe me one-twenty, and Phil, you owe me two-thirty.
Photo of Kevin Malone
Phil
Let’s open a tab, because you and me are gonna be playing more often.
Count me in!
Photo of Andy Bernard
Phil
No.
All right!
Photo of Andy Bernard
Photo of Jim Halpert
Okay. You had some fun, and uh, I think I paid for it. So let me get my last shot in there. Is there anything you can do for me?
I’ll tell you what. My fiscal year ends in two months, let’s talk then. Sound good?
Phil
Photo of Jim Halpert
Absolutely.
Good playing with you guys.
Maguire
Photo of Andy Bernard
Right on.

You know it’s a tough thing, seeing a grown man take six shots to get out of a sand trap but, I had to give Phil credit for not quitting. Which is what I told him. I also told him I don’t quit either, and I’d call him every single day until he gave me his business. Which he then did, after …fifteen minutes of me blocking his car. So I am now his paper supplier! And I shot a 102 today, so I’m feeling pretty good.
Photo of Jim Halpert

Woman on mic
The job fair will be closing in five minutes. Eighth period will commence as scheduled.
Hold down the fort, I have to do something. walks up to microphone Excuse me. If you can hear me, I’d like you to look around at all these companies and know that none of them are good enough for you. H&R Block? Come on, I mean I don’t even know what they do. Frank Regan Funeral Home? Too much formaldehyde! The Air Force? Airforce recruiter glares at Michael Air Force is cool. The refreshments? Bush league! You know, that’s not what you want. Dunder- they, well, okay I see security is coming so I just want to say, come to Dunder Mifflin. Dunder Mifflin, a great place to work! Anybody? Show of hands, anybody want to intern at Dunder Mifflin? We do not offer college credit, we cannot give you any sort of pay, but it is a really fun work environment. Anybody? Show of hands? Damn… it. Okay, I’m gonna wrap it up here. Thank you for your time, and drive safe.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Angela Martin
Dwight and Angela exiting, he opens door for her Thank you.
You’re welcome.
Photo of Dwight Schrute

Photo of Pam Beesley
clink of beer bottles Beers? You closed it?
I closed it!
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Pam Beesley
Yes! Oh! runs into his arms, kisses him Um, congratulations to you, sir. they shake hands business-like
Thank you. Oh, thank you very much. Appreciate it.
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Pam Beesley
Well done.
Thank you. You know what, screw this! pulls Pam into a big smooch
Photo of Jim Halpert
Photo of Kevin Malone
Oooh! Kevin and Andy add suggestive “bow-chicka-wow-wow” vocals

Today I did something stupid. I questioned myself. And I will never do that again. Because I look at somebody like Jim Halpert and I think, that guy can do anything he wants to do. He could do anything, and he chooses to work here, selling paper. Just like me.
Photo of Michael Scott

Photo of Michael Scott
standing way too close to Jim and Pam Yeah, kiss her. Kiss her good. Jim and Pam stop kissing

Hi.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Hello.
I was just wondering, what kind of jobs do you guys have?
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Are you interested in graphic design?
Yeah. Can I fill out an application?
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Oh absolutely, here, take a seat. I should let you know right away, this is just an entry-level job. It’s really basic. We’re looking for like, a self starter, someone who can meet deadlines, who just pretty much just go the extra mile, I guess.
I can do that.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Great. And uh, obviously looking for someone who knows Photoshop, and Dreamweaver. Uh, Corel Painter, Illustrator, AfterEffects, all the basics.
I don’t know any of those.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
laughs It’s actually not super-complicated. I mean I’m sure there’s some sort of like, adult education classes in the area. But if you’re really serious about graphic design, one thing about New York or Philadelphia, they’ve got amazing programs out there for design.
New York or Philadelphia.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Yeah.
All right. Cool, well… thanks.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Sure.
And uh, I’ll look into those.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
You should.
New York or Philadelphia.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
Absolutely.
Okay.
Photo of Pam Beesley
Graphics guy
It’s where the action is.
Thanks.
Photo of Pam Beesley

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